I would give anything to go back... to the afternoons watching The Smurfs, playing My Little Ponies, and feeling the cool breeze blow through the den window while my mom cooked homemade spaghetti in the kitchen.

I would die this moment if I could spend the rest of days swinging in that old hammock, suspended between the two large oak trees in my backyard on Farmbrook Drive.

Oh, how when I was a little one, I so wanted to grow up, and be a "Big Girl."

I miss the teenage years, full of heartaches... the random drives in a fit of rage over a hurt, for not making the cheerleading squad, or my crush on my Chemistry partner who really liked my best friend.

Every time I listen to Depeche Mode's "Enjoy the Silence," and The Cure's "Friday I'm in Love," Tears for Fears, "Everybody wants to Rule the World," I am swept back to those drives in the Appalachian Mountains---those college days, those moments of bliss, of living in that plastic bubble, dancing on the roadside with beers in hand on the Blueridge Parkway, giggling with glee at those frat parties when my sister showed up for the weekend, and we floated on bubbles of champagne or High Life into the wee hours of the morning.

LIfe was so simple.  Love was so raw.  I had so many dreams.  I had so many aspirations.

I had no idea how hard it was going to be.